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Nathan Pusey, who are you?
Substitute teacher knows you too.
You're my grandpa, my uncle and my cousins few
Fell so hard, what can I do?
Get up, you say
Get off the ground
They say it's not normal
When no one hears a sound
Here I am, up off the ground
Can you tell me now
Which way is up or down?
I asked me this one
And I asked me that one
What does it matter?
We all just gettin' fatter.
Bozo the Clown
He knows up from down
Somehow he got it without the feature
The one we call the Substitute Teacher
I'm the Substitute Teacher
Come sit with me
"I was asked to see
what I can really learn you"
Substitute Teacher
Just watch that creature
Substitute Teacher doesn't get sick
The principal she can pick
The lessons to be learned
You know who just got burned
Linked together by the enemy's touch
You know we like you
Not very much
1960s this is no more
So again we ask you, what's the score?
Tell your boss we like your body
But what we're doing is not karate
Action hero there is no place
Substitute teacher knows your face
Find a teacher this we must
Or student minds they will rust
Condi Rice, we could have told her
Not to mess around in Boulder
Tuition costs they are a soaring
But lesson one was not boring
Substitute teacher will be poring
Lesson four and then the score
It will cost you even more
Lessons two and three, your agents cannot see
When a shortage there is of teaching
Substitute teacher will be reaching
Iran, Korea, was it Sumea?
China, Russia and yes sir-eee-a
World class students we will find
But someone else is in a bind
Ukase-ukelele
Playing footsie like a Pele
Fog-of-war is not for melee
The fort on the hill that you hold
Should be stood for clear and bold
When down below the river waits
Fog-of-war will seal your fates
When in the fort you should have been
Pied piper was in your ken
Condi Rice it's not your fault
That program did not halt
Bush peons did their part
With their 1960s art
Now linked together that we are
We proclaim it near and far!
The New York Times, they did not warn you
We're way ahead, not in the rearview
Rivers are for barracuda
But please, not snow machines in Bermuda
That program it must end
The one who put you in the mire
That is the one who must be fired
Force us not your ear to bend
For what message could it send?
Stay the course is automatic
But what we say is diplomatic